Time Well Spent

For Learning to Love You More assignment #35, I asked my family to describe what I do with my time. Three of my favorite people ever rose to the challenge, and they did an excellent job - gold stars all around. I found it hilarious how each of them expressed worry that they would either not do it right ("Do I have to write this in third person?"), or that they did not have enough information to produce a very accurate description. It is strange how little we sometimes know about the mundane, day-in-day-out activities of our important ones. I think we tend to see them in terms of how they impact our own lives and as who they are to us as whole people, not necessarily defined by the details of what they typically choose to do with their free time or what do you actually do at work, anyway? Especially when you live, as I do, far away from your family, they really only know whatever you choose (consciously or unconsciously) to tell them.

This assignment certainly fit into the category of something I'd never done before, and it was fun to read the responses I got. It is admittedly a bit of a narcissistic exercise, but I would recommend it! Here are my responses, in the order I received them:

My Dad
Hi A,
This is what I think you do with your time. (I'm kind of embarrassed that I don't know better)

Your work days probably start at about 7am, with a shower, a cup of coffee, and a quick breakfast, like a bagel or a bowl of cereal. By about 8am, you're out the door and walking/riding the bus downtown, unless you got your bike replaced. You arrive at your office just before 9am, probably get yourself another cup of coffee, and settle in at your desk. You spend your day answering calls from clients, and researching whatever the current projects are. (I'm rather clueless here). You go out for lunch with a co-worker or two, and then it's back to more of the same at the office until 5pm. The bus takes you back to your neighborhood, and you go to the gym to work out for about an hour. It's about seven when you walk in the door and smell K's dinner. A pleasant little hug and kiss from your mate, and you sit down to eat. After dinner, you take care of the dishes, then sit down to check your e-mail, blog, whatever on the PC. I would think you check the day's news headlines also. Next, you settle down on the couch with the K and watch a movie, that is if there's no football on the television. On football nights you probably retire to the room farthest away from the TV room, and get some studying done. I really have not talked to you about the going back to school thing, so I don't know how and where you fit the classes and studies into your day. When K goes to bed early to go to work in the middle of the night, you probably do some homework while he sleeps. You would go to bed about midnight.

On weekends I suspect you guys stay in bed until 10 or 11, unless you have something special planned. Then you get up, have breakfast, and get your laundry started. In the afternoon I expect you would go for a walk or a bike ride. Possibly a little shopping, and then dinner out. You probably walk to a cozy place close to home, so you don't have to worry about having a drink or two. I'm sure you do some reading for pleasure, and you're pretty good about staying in touch with your siblings. I can't come up with much more A, I better call you so you can tell me more about your life. Love you lots!

My Brother
Disclaimer : We don't talk enough, I don't know much about your job, but your awesome and I love you so I'm doing the "assignment" anyways.

In general A is a very happy person; trying to enjoy the simple things in life she often finds herself smiling during her daily routine. Waking up next to a man she loves and working a job she finds at least somewhat rewarding help her stay positive. She spends time commuting to and from work everyday which she does not particularly like, but understands this is simply the price she must pay in order to live in a big city (which she must enjoy... DC-NYC-Chicago). After work A likes to exercise, which she does in a number of ways; riding her bike (until it was stolen), going to the gym, and playing kickball are some of her favorites. I would guess she wants to exercise 5 times a week, but only manages an average of 3. A also spends a large portion of her time at home. Some of her favorite and most time consuming activities include reading and watching movies. Since she subscribes to netflix she probably watches 2-3 movies a week and spends more time on that than reading. A also enjoys home cooked dinners, usually prepared by her boyfriend K, on average 5 times a week. On the off nights they either order in (some sort of asian cuisine or pizza) or go out together for a dinner at a "sit-down" restuarant. Some of A's less time consuming interests include video games (wii), watching tv (daily show), shopping at the local stores (within walking distance), and browsing the internet. A also spends some time every week doing household chores such as buying groceries, taking out the trash, sweeping, and cleaning. Overall A tries to keep herself relatively busy, but always manages to make time for her boyfriend K, who in turn helps keep A the smiling, happy-go-lucky, energetic person she is today.

My Cousin M
(click the image to bring up a bigger, more legible version)

LTLYM #35: Ask your family to describe what you do

It's about time for another LTLYM assignment! Next up is #35: Ask your family to describe what you do. The instructions are:

Ask three family members to write down a description of what it is they think you do with your time. Ask them to try to think about how you live your life and what are your main activites and interests. They could give a particular example of something you are doing, like "at the moment Susie is building a car, and it is taking up most of her evenings and weekends...," but they should not focus on examples of things you have done in the past. Also you are not asking them to say what they think of what you are doing, but only to describe it in as much detail as they know. Don't let the members of your family compare notes (until the the assignment is complete), and similarly try not to put words into their mouth or tell them what they should write. This can be of any length.
Assignment given by Emma Hedditch

I think this assignment could be very interesting. How will my family members respond to the request? Will they be enthusiastic or will it seem like a chore? How will what they write compare to how I see myself?

K's Welcome Home Party, Year 2000

Ok, Miranda, here's my first completed Learning to Love You More assignment - #28: Edit a photo album page. I call it "K's Welcome Home Party, Year 2000."

Details, from top: gas meter, baseball cap, bowl with salad, plastic cups and plates, lamppost, yard statue, back of folding chair.

I was supposed to complete the assignment with one of K's mom's photo albums, but we ended up being so busy throughout Memorial Day weekend that I couldn't find the time. Upon our return to Chicago, I started looking through an album of K's and came across a few pages of photos from his visit to our hometown of Muskegon, Michigan in the summer of 2000. The particular page I chose documents a welcome home party his parents had for him in their backyard. At that time, he was in the army, stationed at Fort Benning in Georgia, and I was living in Singapore. We had broken up a year before (out of what I thought was necessity), and hadn't seen each other since, but our visits home overlapped for about a week and we re-connected fast. And so officially began our two and a half year long-distance relationship (followed, of course, by six and a half more recent years of domestic bliss). But that is a story for another day. Suffice it to say that I am very grateful we both had the opportunity to visit Muskegon in 2000. Thanks for the project, LTLYM!

LTLYM #28: Edit a photo album page

Learning To Love You More (LTLYM) is a web-based project comprised of work made by the general public in response to assignments given by artists Miranda July and Harrell Fletcher. This week, I am going to tackle my first assignment, #28: Edit a photo album page. Here are the instructions:

Look through a friend or relative's photo album. Choose a single page that includes details that you find interesting. Take a piece of solid-colored paper that fits over the entire album page and cut one to ten holes in the paper that reveal details of the pictures. These details can be parts of people's bodies, their pets, a cake, a poster, anything you find visually intriguing. These holes should be small, just isolating the details, with holes that are the shape of the thing you are isolating (cake-shaped hole, tiny hole isolating just someone's head, etc.) Give your page a title that includes the name of the person who's photo album you have used. For instance "Erika's trip to Florida," or "Dave and his dog Walter at the Beach."

K and I will be visiting his parents for Memorial Day weekend, so I plan to complete this assignment using one of his mom's family photo albums. The LTLYM website is no longer accepting submissions, so I will just post my results here on my blog.


You might be wondering what drew me to LTLYM in the first place. Well, I've been loosely following the work of Miranda July ever since I saw her feature-length directorial debut, "Me and You and Everyone We Know." With its motley cast of characters (pictured above), each struggling for some sense of connectedness to the world and each other, this film made me laugh, cry and squirm. And it left me hooked on Miranda.

If you have not seen any of Miranda July's short films, I would recommend "How to Make a Button" and "Are You the Favorite Person of Anybody?" They will make you think and make you smile. And if you like those, you should check out her website and keep your eyes open for a new feature-length film coming soon (in production right now under the working title "Satisfaction").

I have been meaning to do a LTLYM assignment for a while. Some challenge the participant to connect in some way with friends/family/strangers, while others are more focused on creating something tangible. All seem to be about having new and individual experiences - which ties in perfectly with sometimes a strange notion.